I’m working Friday this week and it’s supposed to snow heavily in the afternoon which means I could be snowed into work – a horrible prospect – so just in case I don’t make it back, here’s my slightly premature Friday Fictioneers offering. The first draft came out at a whopping 156 words so I’m quietly proud (in a British understated sort of way) that I managed to chop it down to 100 without losing the essence of the story.
For those who don’t know, this is a challenge to write a 100 word story from a picture prompt. It’s hosted by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields, and anyone can play. Thanks for hosting, Rochelle! Check out the link at the end of my story to see what other fictioneers did with this week’s prompt.
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Copyright-Rochelle Wisoff-Fields
Is Anybody There?
Uncle Harold was a cantankerous old git, so Auntie Agatha’s decision to contact him from the Other Side surprised us. Reluctantly, we positioned ourselves around the dining table holding hands.
‘A candle to light your way,’ Agatha said, placing the candlestick near Harold’s picture. ‘A telephone to aid communication.’
‘And the crayons?’ I asked.
‘If the line’s busy, he can write a message.’
The candlelight flickered. Heads bowed, we closed our eyes.
Silence.
Then a gasp. Our eyes flew open. Across the photo was scrawled, in Harold’s unmistakable hand:
“For God’s sake, woman, can’t you leave me in peace?”
________________________________________________________________________________________________
Click the blue frog to read more stories from other fictioneers.
Hahaha, this is great! Loved Uncle Harold from that first line, but the last line really sealed the deal
So you like cantankerous old gits then? Interesting! Glad you enjoyed it
Dear El,
I hope you don’t get snowed in. I know how that can be. now as for your story. This one left me smiling. Did I say smiling? Out and out laughter is more like it. You couldn’t have written a more perfect ending. Nice work.
Shalom,
Rochelle
HI Rochelle
Didn’t get snowed in (phew!) but am sort of hoping for a bit of snow tomorrow as I fancy a woodland walk in the snow and I’m not back at work until Tuesday. I’m glad my story made you laugh
Lol..this is great.
Ta v much!
Hehe.. Team Uncle Harold all the way.. Had my laugh with this one..
Thanks muZer, glad you liked it
Brilliant! Very good take – idea, and so well-penned!
Thanks yerpirate, what a lovely comment!
Funny short and sweet. Loved it
Short is the name of the game, funny and sweet is an added bonus – thanks for commenting, glad you liked it
had a good laugh..well written
Thanks nightlake
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! I was warned about this from the Queen Blogger. Good one! Keep it going!!!
Yay! I made you laugh. You should probably stop now though before you do yourself an injury.
By the way – who’s the Queen Blogger?
Rochelle.
Loved it! I’m with Harold. As far as the snow goes, if you get snowed in, may it be at home.
Thanks, me too. As for the snow, it’s been a bit of a disappointment so far -more like an icing sugar sprinkling than the serious blizzard predicted by BBC weather.
Where are you in England, if you don’t mind my asking? (Perhaps you’ve said on your site somewhere.)
hahahaha this has to be my fave! that last line killed it.lol ^^
Thanks kz, so thrilled this is your fave!
Creative and terrific take on this challenge. Well-written.
We had our blizzard in Southern Illinois the week of Christmas, and I was snowed in for two whole days. The city trucks came down our roads, but I have a long driveway, and I couldn’t get my car out of my garage and to the cleared road. Hope things go better for you.
Thanks for your lovely comments. I don’t think I’ll be snowed in any time soon after all – and I’m strangely disappointed, must be my inner child clamouring to get out and make snowmen!
I wrote a poem about just that concept a little over a year ago. It related how frustrated and disgruntled I was at the forecast for snow, but then how everything changed once the snow started. When you have some time to visit the “Sandra Conner … By the Book” site, you can click on the “My Original Poetry” page and find it there.
will do. thanks.
NICE STORY… love the last line!
Thanks ted!
Hahahaha!!!! I wouldn’t be surprised if some spirits felt that way. Love your humor. You nailed it.
Absolutely, I think Harold may have had his reasons for being cantankerous! Thanks for your lovely comment.
This is the best I’ve read so far! Ingenious interpretation of the prompt. (We’re out in East Anglia so guess the clouds will be ‘snowed out’ by the time they get here.)
Hi Sandra, thanks for your very generous comments. I’m close to East Anglia too but was still expecting a lot more snow than actually came – my fault for listening to BBC Weather!
Fantastic! Great way to use all the objects, and very funny. I’m in Winchester, plenty of snow here.
Thanks claireful – I didn’t intend to use all the objects originally – especially not those pesky crayons that looked so out of place, but then this idea just fell out of my fingers onto the keyboard – funny how that happens sometimes
Love your sense of humor! This is a fun take on the prompt.
Thanks jennie – glad you liked it
Love the humour in this story, well done.
We are snowed in today (South Wales) so it’s great to have extra time to spend on WP today
Take care
Thanks 40again. South Wales got a lot of snow, so I hear – I’m in the East and we’ve had very little so far so my little panic was all for nothing.
one of my favorites this week. this is just too funny. well done, very well done.
Thanks train-whistle – what a lovely comment!
This is my favorite one this week! I loved it. Made me laugh out loud. The crayons gave me fits too, but I was determined to fit them in! I am so stubborn. haha! Kudos!
PS….if you want snow come visit me in Canada
I think my replies have got all mixed up – you confused me with your crazy double commenting! About the snow – you should see my pathetic excuse for snow – it would make you point and snigger
I live to confuse……sorry.
Thanks Jackie – those crayons were so tricky, weren’t they! Still working those exclamation marks, I see!!!
Yeah, I have a love affair with those darn things. I am trying to use them less, but I’m afraid it’s not working very well.
Hahaha! (Had enough of those today?) Very funny piece! Thanks for sharing.
You can never have enough hahahas! They’re what makes the world go round. thanks for your lovely comment
Very funny…You set me up and knocked me over. Thanks for the laugh.
Tom
thanks Tom – I can’t seem to comment on your blog – it adds funny characters to my website and then rejects the whole thing – will try harder next week – maybe I need to use a different address or something, but while we’re here I’d just like to say that I love your stories every week. Thanks for your excellent comment!
Great fun! It’s snowing here too. Just right for ghost stories. Keep on showing off.
thanks – I love showing off!!!
Hahaha…i love this. Too funny, very well done. Hope you didn’t get snowed in
Thanks boomiebol – the snow has been a bit rubbish so far, they keep predicting heavy snowfall and all we get is an icing sugar dusting- so it doesn’t look like I’m going to get snowed in after all.
Hilarious
Ta
Got a kick out of this one! I like how he was reduced to scrawling with a crayon.
Thanks Danny, I didn’t think I was going to find a use for those pesky crayons at first. Glad you enjoyed it
Great build up of tension shattered by the last line – really well done.
thanks Sarah Ann. Glad you enjoyed it
Have you seen my manatee? I know I left it around here somewhere….
Excellent story by the way, the expectation of the phone, the denouement of the crayon.
I think you may be a little strange, splojofink, but thanks for your lovely comment. If I see your manatee I’ll be sure to let you know
Great story premise and nicely developed with a punch at the end. Enjoyed it. Ron
thanks Ron, glad you enjoyed it
Another great one, El! I love the ending. I also love that he could the crayons if the line is busy. I found that a little comical, although I’m not sure that was your intent. I loved it! – Amy
HI Amy. Glad you liked my little story – the ‘busy line’ was supposed to be comical but with 100 words I had to change the sentence slightly so it lost a bit of it’s original punch – shame really but thems the breaks with FF!
i guess nothing changes from one world to the next…*laughing*
always great to read stories like this one that lighten the day and send us back into life with a smile on our heart.
<3
thanks Sunshine, I’m so glad I have lightened your day!
Very funny and I simply love the expression: a cantanckerous old git, perfect.
Thanks – that’s my favourite part too!
Sounds like Auntie Agatha didn’t like the fact that Uncle Harold got away. Love the fact that he slam-dunked her at the end..
I think she was pretty desperate to keep hold of him one way or another. Thanks for commenting!
Very funny. I was not expecting the ending but I truly enjoyed.
Thanks YJ, glad you enjoyed it
Love, love, LOVE it! Lack of response recently was not due to lack of interest – it was due to moving house!. Just so you know!
Wow, thanks! Hope your move wasn’t too stressful
Exhausting best word to describe it – just finishing main tasks now! Feel a bit like Uncle Harold – just want to be left in peace for a while! All too much!!!
i like that guy! well done.
Thanks, rich, glad you enjoyed it – my story’s not so creepy this week, I thought I might have lost you…
nah. would take more than a genre shift to lose me.
That’s brilliant. Thanks for following my blog – glad I found yours. I’ll follow it.
Almost missed this comment – sorry! Thanks for commenting. I only follow people I really want to read more from – your gravatar isn’t linked to your blog at the moment so I can’t tell which Suzanne you are, but obviously one that interested me! – you probably ought to fix that so people can go from your comments to your blog in one click.
I just fell off my chair laughing. I can just hear those voices in my head. Excellent job.
Thanks Lindy – I love making people laugh. You’ve made my day